Rethinking the Golden Rule

"So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets."
-Matthew 7:12

Aka the Golden Rule. I've always known this principle to be in the Bible, but i've most often refered to it as a societal principle. So ever since first hearing this as a young child in Sunday school class, i've resorted to it in times of uncertainty. I would say to myself:"when in doubt, think of the thing i would want somebody to do to me in this situation, and do it to them. it can't fail right?" Depending upon who you are, you've either nodded you're head at the computer in agreement or you've laughed out loud at my niavety. I would lump this principle from Jesus as a piece of traditional wisdom (similar to the principles given to us in the book of Proverbs). In a near perfect world, the Golden Rule would work 100% percent of the time; but in our fallen and sinful world, sometimes the Golden Rule doesn't easily apply.

Implimenting the Golden Rule in daily life comes with many assumptions of the person applying it and the person it's being used to deal with, mostly character traits. For example, what if you are a very blunt person, therefore desiring that those around you are brutally honest all the time. What if that person decided to apply the Golden Rule to another brotha or sistah in the faith who doesn't share that same character trait? Well, trust me, i've seen it happen before (aka, i've done it before, haha). And the scene of a well intentioned friend speaking strong words of truth in love to a more fragile homie can end up being a waterworks show filled with crushed feelings. Mix and match the different character traits, and even contexts of each conversation, and you'll probably find many situations where the Golden Rule falls short in it's real world application.

This phenomena mimics the psychological theory of enacted vs percieved support. Enacted support is the giver's perspective of helping out a friend, while percieved support is the reciever's perspective of that help. Psychologists have determined that percieved support is EVERYTHING! It doesn't matter how nice, or good, or honest, or helpful your words are gestures are, if the recipient percieves them as hurtful or dangerous, then you've officially wronged them. Another example maybe; you are cleaning up your dorm room, and while you're at it decide to clean up your roommates side as an act of kindness. But your roommate comes back and is extremely pissed that you moved their stuff around and they can't find anything they need. As you absorb their hysteria, you're wondering to yourself: "how could this be? if i were them, i would of loved the kind gesture from a friend." Enacted support vs. percieved support my brothas and sistahs

Wow, i've come to the end of my thoughts on this topic, and i really don't have much of a solution. Maybe it's the fact that it's 1:11am, or the fact that i feel as though i've written long enough. As people who love Jesus Christ and are praying for Him to begin to change our hearts to love the things He loves and desire the things He desires, how do we effectively avoid the pitfalls of poor human perception and nature to apply the Golden Rule properly in our daily lives? Anybody got any words of practical wisdom for me?

~Jamal